Everyone knows the feeling when your large intestines start rumbling and the only way to relieve it is to sit down on the john and let it out. Taking a dump, pooping, laying a deuce, busting a dookie, dropping a load, whatever you may call it, shitting is great. Sitting there, after eating one too many one dollar cheeseburgers from McDonalds, your stomach lets out a low grumble. You cross your legs, shift your weight, talk louder, do anything to keep other people from noticing that you really have to shit! Not being able to hold it in anymore without a colon explosion, you run to the bathroom and drop trou. You let it out into the porcelain bowl of wonder. You instantly feel better and decide to eat some more cheeseburgers. What a vicious cycle.
My friend once told me a story about her creepy suite mate that she intimately called "Weird Al" because this girl not only looked just like the lovely Al Yankovich, but she was also the president of her own Weird Al fan club. "Al" would take laxatives and thoroughly enjoy spraying her shit all over the toilet. My friend and her roommate used to hear her various bathroom noises and then hear her giggle. If you like shitting as much as "Al," you may have a problem. Otherwise, you're just another average American who likes talking about shit, shit jokes, farting, and shitting. Even Elvis died while on the shitter. I think I may go shit right now.
RN
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